As many who have experienced loss know, grief impacts all aspects of our body – emotionally, physically and mentally. Before I lost my husband, I understood grief to be full of sadness, longing and emotional distress. I was not prepared for the physical and mental impacts, which were confusing and disorienting, especially when brain fog set in. The inability to make simple decisions, forgetting why I walked into a room and a feeling of disconnection from day-to-day life became my norm. I wondered if I would ever feel like myself again. So, what is brain fog?

When your spouse passes away, your whole world shifts in an instant. It doesn’t matter if you anticipated them dying or it was unexpected, life changes forever. The person you shared your life with, the one who knew your routines, your quirks, your dreams, is no longer physically here. And suddenly, you're left to navigate not only the pain of loss, but a future that feels unfamiliar and overwhelming.

Yesterday, I went to the doctor for my annual wellness exam. The routine was familiar - the nurse came in first to take my vitals and ask about my medical history. Then she asked "What do you do for work?"

I told her I was a Grief Coach, helping people - primarily widows - process and move through their grief.
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She paused. Her eyes welled up with tears and she shared her own story about losing both of her parents.

​Grief over losing a loved one is something we all hear about, but until we experience it firsthand, we don’t fully understand its depth. When my husband suddenly passed away, I thought I knew what grieving him would entail – sadness, tears, and eventually healing. But, I learned that grief has its own timeline and a complex range of emotions and symptoms that would send me into complete survival mode. Here are five things about grief that took me by surprise.